Spoon Theory
Spoon Theory was created by the writer Christine Miserandino to help explain what living with fatigue or limited energy can feel like. She used spoons as a simple metaphor for units of energy. During a lunchtime conversation with a college friend, she gathered spoons from around the table and used them to show how everyday activities gradually use up a person’s energy across the day.
For many people, available energy can feel almost unlimited. They can get up and move through simple daily routines without much planning. However, people living with chronic illness, neurodivergence, or mental health challenges often begin the day with a limited number of “spoons”.
Each activity uses some of that energy, and the amount it takes can vary from person to person, depending on how physically, mentally, or emotionally demanding the task is for them.
For example, simple tasks like brushing teeth might use one spoon, while more complex activities—such as going to a supermarket—may use many more (it uses our sensory motor system, cognitive function, intrapersonal skills and interpersonal skills). If too many spoons are used in one day, a person may feel overwhelmed, tired, may shut down or become agitated. They may need to “borrow” energy from the next day, leaving them even more exhausted.
Spoon theory helps parents understand why some children or teenagers must carefully pace their energy and may not always be able to do everything expected of them in a single day. It helps us all to begin to wonder what we need to do to ‘gather’ spoons – read, listen to music, rest – without fear of judgement, allowing for more compassion and connection within our lives.